My name is Sandra Ledesma. A language learning a new langua first and foremost, I have gone through the turmoil that you are going through today. I was an adult by the time I started to make real progress learning a new language (English). It once seemed that no matter how hard I tried, it was never going to be enough. I could not pinpoint what I was doing wrong, even though it was obvious I was doing something wrong. It took me years of trial and error to come up with a system that worked for me.
I say this because I was aware of the opportunities that it would open up to me. Not too long ago, I was standing exactly where you are. There were times when it seemed nothing was going right for me. I would push myself and push myself, only to come up short.
Here is the thing: it is difficult to get to that point. It is even difficult to figure out where to start. You have bought books and taken classes. Again and again, you have resolved to master the Spanish language, only to come up short. It seems, every time you tell yourself you can do it and then stumble, the discouragement is going to be too heavy for you to pick up the pieces and carry on again. All of that stress adds up.